March 4, 2024

Do you ever find yourself staring in disbelief at a social media post, failing miserably to answer even the most basic question: ‘Why?’

Well, that’s where we found ourselves this morning when this bit of insanity popped up on our timeline from Twitter/X user Bryan Johnson (yes, we’re serious).

Yeah, this is not going to be our typical hard news piece. We were stuck somewhere between ‘We saw it and now you do too’ and ‘These replies are just too funny not to share’. So here we are. You’re welcome.

This dude measured THAT and then decided to post it on Twitter/X for all the world to see. Social media was a mistake.

But he had a chart! That makes it all professional and stuff. LOL.


Visitation at the funeral home might be extremely awkward.


There were some fans, but the general consensus was a resounding ‘Bro! What are you doing?’

Every time we think things can’t get weirder, something like this arises.


Thanks, Bryan. We’ve all been dying to hear the latest stats.

‘Hey, did you see Kansas City has a 7.3% drop rate heading into the Super Bowl?’

‘Yeah, dude, that doesn’t bode well for the Chiefs. I also saw that Bryan Johnson from Twitter is now up to 179 minutes of … ‘

Please do not give him any ideas.

(Pulls chart from briefcase.)

Speaking of TMI. 👀

Thank you! Some things are better left unposted.

LOL! Now that’s good.

Rest well, Bryan.


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